Sometimes all those different elements take a long time to dissolve and break down. The speed with which that brew changes from nasty to nourishing varies widely with the internal and external conditions. It’s hard to be patient, to let everything, both scorned and enjoyed, stew in our symbolic personal compost piles. The cycles of the natural world, into which we are interwoven, take time. This meditation is part of the toolkit in the audio course Shining Bright Without Burning Out. Research shows self-compassion helps us stay present and kindhearted without sinking into absorptive empathy, which can lead to overload and burnout. Like composting, it isn’t always pretty, but it’s potent. Self-compassion (and compassion for others) holds both the rejected and respected parts of who we are. Our personal work includes processing our own “dark” sides, the parts we’d like to hide or discard. It all transforms into a rich sloop that eventually nourishes future plants. It’s also the leftovers from delicious things we appreciate and enjoy, silky mango skins, green tea leaves, dark coffee grounds.
Compost is the stuff we reject, the moldy, wilted, too hard, too soft, nasty bits that don’t make it to the table. Cue the weird, glorious cabbage flower which came to life in the dark. Nature is our ultimate model and guide-in the light, in the dark, and in the most surprising and gorgeous ways. How can we do this if we already feel overloaded? Having compassion for ourselves and others is especially important in times of literal and metaphorical darkness. Many people are feeling a collective spiritual darkness now, exhausted and frustrated, maybe also angry and scared. Reflecting on the discovery of this “flower” in the shadows, I’m reminded of, and heartened by, the fertility of dark times. It blossomed into something unexpected, unusual, and fiercely beautiful. Instead of fading quietly however, it burst into new life in the dark grotto of my cabinetry. This exquisite thing grew out of a chunk of purple cabbage that I’d put under the sink to go out for compost. It was elegantly twisted, like a dragon at a Chinese New Year celebration. Some time ago, I found a strange bloom in the kitchen. Compassion is the magic ingredient that turns our personal “compost” into personal evolution.
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